Noise Complaint Aficionado Mugs

To avoid the nuisance of unattended car alarms, all 2008 models must have owner specific alarms.

'If this is tea, I'll have a coffee. If it's a coffee, I'll have a tea!'

'I'm going to drag my sled up and down the sidewalk until the noise drives nature crazy and it snows.'

"War is hell and so is this soup."

Future garbage truck driver.

"I'll stop when I'm good and ready to."

'... and the winner for 'The Noisiest Picture of the Year' is...'

'If God had meant us to fly, he'd give us more leg room.'

'I wanted this on the rocks.'

In, Out, Complain.

'Don't forget to take your tranquilizers Daddy, little Jimmy is coming round to play.'

'You haven't heard anything yet!'

'A word of advice, the squeaky wheel gets the totally organic, 0 trans-fat, soy-based lubricant.'

"You know damn well what noise!"

Complaints departement for men and women.

'Someday we'll look back on this and think, ‘Why the hell didn't we sue?' '

Cat and Broom

"Waiter, there's a hair in my soup!"

Wake the eff up with the official New York City alarm clock. Choose your distress signal: car horns, sirens, barking, heat pipes, mouse feet. Guaranteed to disturb!

Cop gives ASBO to cockerel: 'This of this as a cock-a-doodle-don't.'

'... Further to our telephone conversation of the 3rd, my fax of the 11th, my letters of the 16th, 23rd and 28th, my emails of....'

Leaf-Blowers: Loudly making yardwork someone else's problem since the 1960s.

"Threatening to call the Noise Abatement Society isn't being very romantic, Sydney."

'The cannon will go off every 20 minutes just to make sure you're paying attention,'

Library Grand Opening

A question you can't ask at a football game - 'Has anyone lost their keys?'

"Now that's what I call a sound system."

"Vuuuuuuuuuuu!"

Playing dustbins

Complaints clerk to consumer: A hair in your TV dinner? Maybe it belongs to a celebrity!

Continental Breakfast...$2.99: 'What continent is THIS supposed to represent?'

'I wish you would come to me first with your grievances, instead of going directly to the United Nations Committee on Human Rights.'

Ambulance Paramedic making the 'Nee Naw' noise.

'Please. Don't get me started.'

"Mmm... now WHERE did i leave my radio..?"