Night Time Routines Gifts

Four different kinds of sleepers.

Late night teddy reading

"Amen. . . void where prohibited by law."

"Damn. I took the Rip Van Nyquil."

Sleepwalker on treadmill

"If you insist on doing all the voices, Dad. Don't you think father bear should have a deeper voice than Goldilocks?"

'Good night, Dear. Text me if you need anything.'

"Good evening, Susan. We've decided it's time you get your own bed."

'And you're telling me this, why?'

"The moral of the story, honey, is that being a celebrity does not make you a credible children’s book author."

"Don't pretend you're sleeping."

Toothbrush Romance

"I didn't say my prayers, but I e-mailed God earlier."

"Your princess voice is kind of patronizing."

'I'm glad you're reading my night night story. Dad being a tax attorney only reads chapter 11.'

"No, four glasses of water was enough. . . now I have to go to the bathroom!"

"Am I looking happy or sad in the appropriate places?"

',,,and they all lived happily ever after, Now close your eyes and go to sleep'

"Hoora! I made it through another day!"

"Dad—will the heroine go into rehab?"

No caption (A daughter shines a light from her cellphone as her dad makes a Twitter icon shadow puppet).

"The prince, …. what's his back story?"

"Here’s a book with a pretty peacock on the cover. Let’s try this Flannery O’Connor story before bed."

The Uncle Vinnie Insomnia Open

"Let's go to sleep so that when we wake up today will be tomorrow."

"Sweet dreams my little tax break."

'But I'm not tired yet!!!'

'Just checking that I've turned off the lights, dear!'

"...and thank you for sending my guardian angel to protect me from that truck today..."

"I'm not saying a horrible creature lives under your bed."

Bat

'She let the bedbugs bite.'

Unable to get going each day without her dose of Katie Couric, Lois shifted her schedule to be in sync with the star's new evening news job.

"Read it again, Daddy!"

''...And they all lived slap-happily ever after.''