Night Routines T-Shirts

"I can't sleep. I think I'll get up and solve all my problems."

"Don't pretend you're sleeping."

Late night teddy reading

"Amen. . . void where prohibited by law."

Sleepwalker on treadmill

"Damn. I took the Rip Van Nyquil."

"If you insist on doing all the voices, Dad. Don't you think father bear should have a deeper voice than Goldilocks?"

'Good night, Dear. Text me if you need anything.'

"The moral of the story, honey, is that being a celebrity does not make you a credible children’s book author."

'And you're telling me this, why?'

"Good evening, Susan. We've decided it's time you get your own bed."

Toothbrush Romance

"I didn't say my prayers, but I e-mailed God earlier."

',,,and they all lived happily ever after, Now close your eyes and go to sleep'

"Your princess voice is kind of patronizing."

"Am I looking happy or sad in the appropriate places?"

'I'm glad you're reading my night night story. Dad being a tax attorney only reads chapter 11.'

"No, four glasses of water was enough. . . now I have to go to the bathroom!"

"Hoora! I made it through another day!"

"Dad—will the heroine go into rehab?"

"The prince, …. what's his back story?"

'But I'm not tired yet!!!'

"Let's go to sleep so that when we wake up today will be tomorrow."

"Sweet dreams my little tax break."

"Here’s a book with a pretty peacock on the cover. Let’s try this Flannery O’Connor story before bed."

'Just checking that I've turned off the lights, dear!'

"...and thank you for sending my guardian angel to protect me from that truck today..."

"I'm not saying a horrible creature lives under your bed."

''...And they all lived slap-happily ever after.''

"Hello moon, the sun sends his regards."

'She let the bedbugs bite.'

"Read it again, Daddy!"

Bat

"...went to sleep. And then Mr. Donkey became very quiet and drowsy and he went to sleep. And then Miss Mouse became very quiet and drowsy and she went to sleep. And then Mrs. Bear became very quiet and drowsy and she went to sleep. And then..."

"Mind if I read a little?"