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Rest in Peace Instant Replay

'My feet are killing me.'

"He tested positive for a new fever ... TB12."

Bernie the Monday morning quarterback meets David the Monday morning linebacker.

"Wait! Stop! He changed his mind."

It had been a while, but he had finally come home.

100k Desert Crawl

"Any other reason for your disappointment with God other than your team has never won a Superbowl?"

NFL quarterback slides feet-first to the ground and avoids a mugging,

"Edgar isn't here. He's working out with the Dallas Cowboys."

"Well, dad. . . when I was a kid I got in trouble for trampling on the lawn or for beating up others. . . today, I get a lot of money for it!"

'Stop! Don't try to move him until we get his insurance information!'

'...Do the Hokey-Pokey and turn yourselves around...'

So you're wearing a bag over your head because you're ashamed of your team?' 'It's a cloaking device.'

'Those with a lot of Money.'

"I'm against pain killers for players, but I'm for them for supporters."

'Break a leg.' - 'Thanks a lot.'

'That, and my head is shaped like one.'

"Fifty yard line! I bet you thought it was a silly necklace..."

Tom Brady retires after finally seeing his shadow

"Sweetie, I know we missed Princesses on Ice, but I'm going to make it up to you."

NFL's 50 Most Masterful Uses of the Clock

Cheerleaders from another planet

"She's a little overworked but, depending on what happens next Sunday, I'll probably jump back on."

"Hey -- if you ever want to talk about this no hitter, I'm here."

Football laughs as receiver misses pass.