New Tech Adopter T-Shirts

Taking the Driverless Car Out for a Spin.

"Textin’"

God's Phone

"Are our prayers answered whether we have an iphone or an android?"

"My best friend is my phone."

"I hear you have been split testing our online advertising campaign. I haven't got a clue what that is but stop it now."

"Can't fix the WiFi? How times flies! Seems only yesterday you couldn't program the VCR!"

"Oh, just sitting back and letting algorithms do all the stock trading."

"Give us a chip."

"Virtual Reality glasses. Well, I said my sermon would let them see the real difference between Heaven and Hell this morning"

Luddite Zoom.

"So when do we go online?"

Cable Bill.

Two years ago, during a special episode of the Ask Sadie show, our resident octogenarian asked readers for advice about how she can deal with her midlife crisis. Here is an actual reader letter: Dear Sadie, My son just taught me how to use an iPad, so I am writing to tell you that doing so makes me feel young again. You might want to try it. - Nathaniel from Ontario. Thank you for helping me feel young! I may not be as spry as I was back in the old days ... but at least I've never taken two whol

"Let me see if I can get Him on speakerphone."

'Hello, technical support? Which one is the 'any key'?'

Cashier for Decoration Purposes Only

"I like you and all, but I normally only date guys that stare down at their cell phones."

"Hi, Mum, I'm last in the race, but I do have the best mobile."

Couple are so focused on their cellphones they don't notice their house burning down around them.

'Well, he's back from tech support.'

Dog using MP3 player scowls at dog that's still listening to gramophone player.

'Does 'Amen' mean 'Send'?'

'Next time the captain says to turn off your cell phone, just do it!'

After 15 years Mike was released

"Mommy, will you please tell us the story about the man who brokered our overseas adoption?!"

'New Religion'

"Let us bow our heads, turn off our cell phones, and pray."

"Your mission number one, should you choose to take it, is to seek and destroy the new laptop"

'Thank's for your patience as we transition to electronic filing. . . Mrs. McGillicuddy.'

Text As A Second Language

Woman checks her phone while being operated on.

'To prove we only sell the latest products, we guarantee we'll be selling a new model by the time you get this one home.'

'You may hang up if you want. I just don't want to eat alone in public without a cell phone in my hand.'

"I asked my mom for a new iPhone, and she said she would 'get right on it.' Luckily, I have an app that alerts me of sarcasm."