New Political Appointment T-Shirts

Who's nuts in politics?

"You've got your corner office, so what more do you want?"

The president's men

"Based on the feedback from advisers whom I haven't beheaded, all of my ideas are great."

Public Relations: Reputations cleaned and repaired

'I hear you got your increase.' - 'Yes, that proves my theory, if you whine enough, you get anything you want.'

First you're a law student, then you're a lawyer, then you're a judge, then you're a politician, then you're a criminal.

Under new blame.

SAGE mentality

Surprised chicken: 'I know. I can't believe it either.'

Rock and a Hard Place

'Yes, it's a stupid speech, Senator, but you've got to court the stupid VOTE.'

'This 'infrastructure' stuff you keep talking about -- does it have anything to do with vegetables?'

'If you have to ask, you can't afford it.'

'Staffers don't report we're managing decline. They report we met our targets and did out job!'

"Rudy has asked me to apologize, on his behalf, for your being offended..."

"No, no, that’s in a bar, Mr. President — you can talk politics and religion here."

"I'm not spinning - I'm contextualizing."

"Our intelligence shows that everybody loves us."

Automatic Congressman

"He's only been president a few months. Just give hima little time."

"Our rule of thumb is: 'Keep it complicated' - so no one will understand how we choose a candidate."

"What kind of politician would I be if I didn't politicize this crisis?"

Half a house is better than none.

'Don't be nervous but I think we're about to go LIVE on the new system.'

"Some of it is soft and some of it is hard, but the main thing is that all of it is money."

'Taking bribes is understandable, Senator, but you really shouldn't keep billing records.'

The Election Strategy

Voting in the UK

"Is there a spin doctor in the house?"

'He's trying to fine-tune the economy again.'

"I always forget. Is this the day we spin ahead one hour?"

Another Rogue Trader

'Hi! I'm a freshman -- when do I get corrupted?'

StRATegist: Dominic Cummings