New Parrot Owner Pillows

"He can afford a bigger cage. His old tax forms line the bottom."

"When is my next parole hearing?"

"Any idea how long your family might be visiting?"

'You know too much!'

A little bird told me...

Hey. Hey. Polly wants some folly.

"He also barks, meows and makes noises like a hamster."

"As I was only saying the other day..."

'Stop cracking and hulling his seeds. He's accustomed to working for his food.'

'I suppose you want Polly to forget she heard that.'

"Garbage in, garbage out!"

'Polly wants a cracker! Fetch!'

"I finally gave in, I got sick of hearing, 'Polly want a podcast?... Polly want a podcast!'"

"Best project manager we ever had."

"I don't actually talk, I just mimic sounds."

'It's the pink spot, Jim lad - them rascals is going to try and tweak my nipples!'

"Here's one, Matey! 'Must Love Parrots.'"

Marcel Marceau's parrot

"The incessant chatter was driving me crackers, so I got him his own twitter account."

'I object, Your Honor! Hearsay evidence!'

'You reek of crackers.'

'You know darn well 'Aaargh' isn't a real word!'

Pirates

"Service."

"Repeat after me..."

'How come I always get the shoulder with the parrot?'

Sorry, I thought you said you wanted to see 'Parrot Normal Activity'

'Oi, call the fire brigade, my foot's stuck.'

"You spend far too much time on social media, Joe!"

"Well, maybe you want crackers Mum, but frankly, given the choice, I would prefer chocolate cake..."

This historic alpine hut has stood here among the native beech trees for over a century, and may stand for another, often unoccupied by always watched over by that ever playful mountain parrot, the Kea.

"Rest assured, anything you say in this office won't get repeated by me."

'You know, our health plan doesn't cover dental.'