New Job At Grocery Store T-Shirts

After her laser surgery, Alice was able to read barcodes without an optical scanner.

"Good For You / Bad For You"

But is it organic?

Bad for you but to die for

Twenty-first century baby walker

"Wild-caught, farm-raised, lab-grown, beach-found, or aquarium-harvested."

Organic Produce: No Pesticides, Herbicides or Bad Vibes.

Thank you, Essential Workers

"Mom, I'm at work – let me call you back after I finish stocking milk for wealthy vegans who like beet juice in their meat alternatives so they can still get that bloody effect when cooking without guilt."

Important Food Groups

"We're odd looking but just as good."

"I want some long, thin square ones - for chips..."

"Let's see. Seuss... Seuss... Here we go. That's a medium box of bagels and lox and a pop on the rocks by seven o' clock."

Lioness Shops for Snacks.

'Kix? Yes, Ma'am -- you can get your Kix on aisle 66.'

'Tesco's cheif executive meets with staff.'

Only 1 calorie per serving: One million servings per can.

"Oh my god -- I can't believe it's real butter!"

Only One Item or Fewer.

'I decided to start buying food in bulk. I hope you're hungry!'

"Hey, Al! What do you know about shelf life?"

Don't have a hot flush....

'VEGETARIAN ZOMBIES' BW

"Your next pilgrimage must be to a bodega for milk."

'Frank, leak to the tabloids that these slow moving broccoli flakes cure cancer.'

Lemon Harangue Pie Mix

'Apparently the nutrients and the additives cancel each other out.'

Food samples in supermarket - 'There's a stick in mine.'

Biker chopper shopper

'I just couldn't think of the word poultry.'

'...Contains Phixe-knide, TBHQ, hydro-cla, Cyklid, Yetfopnmide - and other unpronounceable stuff.' (grocery store)

Artificial Isle

"No one can afford to eat us anymore."

'It's just a casual job for the summer.'

"Sugar, trans fats, and an adorable dead baby lamb. Cash back?"