New Entertainment System T-Shirts

Changing Times - TV.

"Our kids may like your giant soundbar, but the neighbors seem to have a different opinion."

"This is a lovely old song that tells of a young woman who leaves her cottage, and goes off to work. She arrives at her destination, and places some solid NHHS in a flask containing 0.50 atm ofammonia, and attempts to determine the pressures of ammonia and hydrogen sulide when equilibrium is reached."

'The History Channel is all reruns.'

They hated me.

Showbiz Awards

Benedict Cumberbatch

Dear, could you please pick up some batteries? The ones in the remote are dead and I feel like I'm Amish.

"If I might be serious for a moment..."

"Have you tried binge-watching a show together?"

"This is the perfect way to watch movies if you love mosquitoes and having a cold, wet butt."

A small snooker player chalking his cue.

Clown teaches how to speak Jibberish

Unforgettable, that's what you are... Gnat King Cole

"We just watched a hypermovie!"

Take seat. Nothing makes me happier than keeping people warm and cooking s'mores for them. Friendly fire.

"I've no idea. Maybe it's the slumber channel."

The Rooster Comedian.

"Would you sit and watch a 12 hour movie?"

A Guide to Balloon Animals

"Hi there! - I'm the world's first eco-friendly comedian... All My Jokes Are Recycled...!"

Television Readers.

Champagne

"I've seem an awful lot of movies ever since they cut them all down to two minutes."

"And this is our media room."

C'mon, it'll be fun! I'll throw on some stars, pop in a few planets, drum up a life form or two, and this place will be hoppin'! The Big Shebang Theory.

'They all laughed when I told them that I was going to marry a magician.'

"I like movies that resemble my life, so I don't feel like I'm wasting time watching a movie."

"I need a little more drama like a ten part mini-series."

'Office Woofers. For the quiet and obnoxious boss.'

"Ernestine is trying to get St. Patrick to change his mind."

'That'll be four twenty for the beers and sixty quid for the Xmas decorations.'

Cow Show Tunes

"Well, the remote's not dowmn the back of the couch."

'There's nothing on.'