New Cook In The Family Pillows

"Tia Carmen, did you ever use a stool to cook?"

"I was with you right up to the cumin."

A woman standing beside a stove full of steaming pots and pans.

Lady of the Cake.

Domestic Goddess.

'I'm in my Blue period.'

''ere - I thought you said your pans were non-stick!'

'Like death by salad.'

"O young, naive one...you must know the golden rule of the kitchen. To avoid the mother of all disrespects...never criticize the cooking of a family elder."

'Sorry, but we're going out for dinner.'

Happy Knife, Happy Wife

"I'm afraid the challah got a little burnt this week."

'Life is all attitude: 45 seconds of enjoying it...45,000 hours of regretting it...'

"Mommy's going to teach you how to make a hamburger."

How to Deal With Leftover Turkey

'White smoke means she decided what to cook. Black smoke means it's done.'

'It's just some Pour 'n' Serve, Stir 'n' Blend, Bake 'n' Slice, Mix 'n' Broil and Chop 'n' Simmer.'

'Muriel's philosophy is that what happens in the kitchen, stays in the kitchen.'

Horn of Leftovers

"....And then chuck the whole lot in the dustbin and phone for a take-away."

"My wife tells me the bee has struck again!"

Surprise in the salad bowl

'What's that humming sound?'

"Prepare to meet your maker."

"Nice try, Mom, but I'm going to go with a caterer."

How to correctly estimate cooking time

I made you a cake!

'It's labour-saving because with this you'll be able to burn my meals much faster!'

"Oh we're fine, my husbands just learning to cook during the quarantine."

"I grabbed it away from Larry and seasoned it properly just in time. It's a rescue meatloaf."

Family working together

Recipe involving the switching off of the smoke alarm...

'and then stand in dish for two hours.'

Ten out of ten for effort...

'Something new for Sunday lunch today - Corned-beef sandwiches!'