Nephew Pillows

"First of all, this conversation never happened."

"Most of what I want this year is listed on the Nasdaq."

"But, remember, you're responsible for your own happiness."

'I found some information in this book for my school paper. How do I click 'print'?'

"They had their names removed using the right to be forgotten."

'Hey Einstein, how about converting some of your mass into energy and getting this place cleaned up?'

Child with a junior chemistry set in the complaints department.

"C'mon, time to get up and stare at your devices all day."

'Why are you giving me an allergy shot. Shouldn't you be giving me an anti-allergy shot?'

Warren Buffett as a child

"I'm hoping for a pardon from the Governor."

Principal: You are here, and you should be ashamed of yourself.

'I didn't write the book report. I downloaded and printed it directly from the Internet, but I did collate and staple it myself.'

'You always bring me the same thing every year, toys games sports equipment. I never get what I really want!' - 'What's that?' - 'Real estate!'

'My finger's stopped bleeding. I must have run out of blood.'

'I really crammed last night.'

"Forget lemonade. The real money's in bottled water."

'I'm afraid I still have more questions than answers.'

'I didn't write the report. I printed it directly from the Internet, but I did all of the stapling and collating myself.'

'When I ask what our inventory is 'What ever' is not an acceptable answer.'

'School sports day - fat boys playing computer game'

"I don't think I can express what I have to say in just colored paper and glue."

'This test doesn't understand me.'

Two children are running lemonade stands outside their home; one stand is more popular than the other.

"'How I Spent My Summer Vacation,' by Lilia Anya, all rights reserved, which includes the right to reproduce this essay or portions thereof in any form whatsoever, including, but not limited to, novel, screenplay, musical, television miniseries, home vid

Teacher: 'As an adult you'll probably only use a quarter of what you're taught at school - which brings us to fractions.'

'I must be growing up. I've caught myself washing my hands without being told to.'

'Now then you two, you can't both be Australia - one of you has to be England!'

'After you grade my report, may I have my intellectual property back?'

'You gotta learn to talk, Jeffrey -- it's part of the aging process.'

Homework Done and Homework Eaten Stands.

'Want to hear something scary? This is the third time this week I've gotten off the bus and still remember what I've learned.'

"I wish my Dad would get off my back! It's only been nine years and he wants to know if I've picked a major yet!"

'It's all original research. I had no assistance when I looked it up on Wikipedia.'

'Homework done only $1.00' 'Homework eaten only $0.50'