Neighborly Comedian Pillows

'That was rude, my neighbor acted like he didn't even know me.'

'Darn those neighbors. A cookie's missing.'

'I think that our next door neighbor might have lived here.'

'For Sale by Neighbor'

It's from the homeowners association --- They want me to stop leaving my worries on the doorstep.

'Do you realize he barked all last night?'

'Great! Thanks to the damn mortage crisis, we've got to live in a neighbourhood now where we wake up with yellow feet every second morning...'

'He's training for a career in law.'

'Not faster than sound, Pete, think of the neighbors!'

Robinia Floribunda

'Uh oh. Wax moths! There goes the neighborhood.'

"Your rose dust gets into everything, and your caladiums attract toads; and another thing: your damn marigolds are stinking up the whole area."

"It's been a rainy winter."

"Regular, grande, or lemon latte?"

The Last of the Passenger Pigeons

Manhole Warning

'This is the last time I'm walking the dog! Our neighbor told me if spot poops on his lawn again, he's going to rub MY nose in it!'

Jingle Bell Rock // Silent Night

Never use an electric can opener if you live next door to a cat lady.

'I just remembered something! We forgot to put 'open bar' on the invitations!'

"Smoke signals from my neighbor's grill. He's asking if he can borrow some ice."

'How very Blackheath!'

'I'll bet you I can make the neighbor look over the fence and yell, 'shut up, you stupid mutt'!'

'But they can't close your local, you're the pub bore!'

'The neighbors don't care how you commute, but they're beginning to complain about the noise.'

Dog Work Ethics

A friendly neighbour helps man to escape discovery by an angry husband.

Flea in the ear

Cull people who clear leaves or snow from their sidewalk by shoving it onto their neighbor's.

Sign reads: 'Kisses ?5.00'

'...and why shouldn't she be sleeping with your next door neighbour - she's my wife!'

'What d'you mean,Doris-you,ve burnt OUR dinner,and hers NEXT door,and hers NEXT door again and...?'

"Don't answer—it's those pickleballers again."

'Oh don't worry about George, he's just got worms.'

"They must be out...'Neighbours' is on the television!"