Neighborhood Watch Comedian T-Shirts

'I'm not worried - John has always said sex is no more dangerous than letting off a rocket in a cul-de-sac.'

"One lousy incident years ago with the neighbourhood's bins, and ever since, I'm tied up every garbage-night..."

"Don't you think you're taking this whole, 'neighbourhood watch' thing a little too serious, dear?"

"A home recently sold in my neighborhood."

Dog says hi to a cat.

'I think that our next door neighbor might have lived here.'

It's from the homeowners association --- They want me to stop leaving my worries on the doorstep.

'Do you realize he barked all last night?'

'She's the worst gossip I've ever come across.'

Suburban street.

"This neighborhood has a strong sense of community that borders on siege mentality."

'Great! Thanks to the damn mortage crisis, we've got to live in a neighbourhood now where we wake up with yellow feet every second morning...'

"Welcome to the neighbourhood. I hope you like savory pies."

'Phase Two : More of the same'

'Not faster than sound, Pete, think of the neighbors!'

'The neigborhood's best watchdog!'

'Uh oh. Wax moths! There goes the neighborhood.'

Robinia Floribunda

"It's been a rainy winter."

"Regular, grande, or lemon latte?"

"Your rose dust gets into everything, and your caladiums attract toads; and another thing: your damn marigolds are stinking up the whole area."

'We video all these trick or treat transactions...for security reasons.'

"What's he doing now?"

"Pleased to meet you neighbour! I'm the first wave of gentrification."

Beware of Curmudgeon!

'Yeah, neighborhood crime. That's what I watch all the time 'cause our TV is broken.'

Neighbourhood watch and slug watch.

Before podcasting, there was bobcasting...

"It does seem an odd place to put it."

"I'm Bob and this is my wife, Sue. Don't even think about trying to get past us."

'Well, that ties up the inventory of our new neighbours' possessions.'

Gossiping neighbours.

'It's the fellow in 9B.'

"Smoke signals from my neighbor's grill. He's asking if he can borrow some ice."

"Ever wonder what goes on over there?"