Neighborhood Sage T-Shirts

"He can be very condescending."

$1: Family Secrets

"Want me to talk to the squirrel's mother, or would you prefer to handle it on your own?"

"Bark bark bark bark bark" "Fwd: bark bark bark bark bark" "Fwd: fwd: bark bark bark bark bark" "Fwd: fwd: fwd: bark bark bark bark"

“Sweet mother of Marmaduke... no!”

Jack Finds The Giant Grilling At His Giant Grill

The stages of gentrification: a guide

'Henderson always walks away with the neighborhood pumpkin carving contest.'

'We want more police on our streets!' 'WHAT?! Do you have any idea how dangerous it is out there?'

'Look, I want you back, but I'm not going to beg.'

'Do you realize he barked all last night?'

"I said 'neighborhood watch'; they said 'peeping Tom.' "

'You sure your dad won't mind if we use his silicone spray?'

"The house next door is slated for demolition, but your house is in the way."

The Consequences of an Interrupted Shower.

'Fred's opinion of crab grass is if you can't beat it, join it.'

"Me, I love vacuuming: it makes the dog next door barking mad! Works every time..."

"Of course, you try to raise your kids so they won't need lawyers."

'Happy Town' See the smiley face?

'John... is that a collar?'

Location, Location, Location - Next 3 exits.

'He says he's training to be a world champion weightlifter - With a knife and fork.'

'Your neighbor wanted me to break up a wild party, but actually, I find this a congenial affair,'

"I walk into their yard every few days and knock over their trash. How do you know the Johnsons?"

Interrupted Shower.

Giant Cannon in the Suburbs

"There exists within each of us the infinite potential to become the neighbor from hell."

"... And in other news: Still no truce at 75 Greene Street, apartment 3F."

'Hello, I've just moved in next door. Can I borrow some sugar please?'

Street Smarts.

Sketchy Neighborhood

Neighbourhood watch and slug watch.

"You got another letter from the neighborhood association..."

"Brenda takes no chances over someone stealing our washing."

"Yes, I've seen a few changes."