Neighborhood Conversationalist Pillows

"We had hail last night the size of..........hail!"

'You must be Jim's new gardener. I'm his neighbour, Gerald. Had any luck with the Petunias this year? Aren't those Jim's feet sticking out of the ornamental pond?'

“Sweet mother of Marmaduke... no!”

'He's great, he can even fetch the paper. Off the neighbour's step.'

"It's a beautiful day. I should go for a walk. . . Oh, now my neighbors are all out there."

Second-hand Slander and Innuendo £10

One giant bark for dogkind.

'Dog got your clog?'

'Honey, it's not the Feds. It's the pseudo-feds.'

David Cameron: 'Is there a volunteer in the house?'

'He lives in a house, and it's by the side of the road, but he's still not a friend to man.'

'It's going to be harder to get back than you think. We're now part of a subculture of a counter culture.'

The Burbs

"It's been a rainy winter."

"Your rose dust gets into everything, and your caladiums attract toads; and another thing: your damn marigolds are stinking up the whole area."

Robinia Floribunda

'Uh oh. Wax moths! There goes the neighborhood.'

'Hello! I don't believe I've bored you yet...'

This is Bad Feng Shui!

"Things have gotten bad here. There's talk of a war with another gated community."

'Oh great. The neighbors are worming their way into another BBQ.'

'This looks like a really hot piece of gossip, Edna!'

'It's the fellow in 9B.'

'And this is Mario Batali. Of course, he's not the Mario Batali.'

"What do you think our husbands talk about when they're down the pub?"

'Can Spot come out and play?'

Passive smoking...

"We seem to have a lot more time together since George started working from home."

"They must be out...'Neighbours' is on the television!"

'Oh don't worry about George, he's just got worms.'

'Really? He has his father's nose?... Is his father Cyrano De Bergerac?'

"I always thought it was over the fence gossip, not insider trading."