Needlework Lover T-Shirts

'Don't tell anybody, I'm expecting a doll.'

Hem-orrhoids.

I quilt therefore I am

'I knew there was part of the pattern missing!'

Arts and crafts

Knit One, Pearl One, Drop One.

I love embroidery

'It's good of you to go out of your way to show me what not to do, Mum.'

"This is nice. You have your knitting and I have my vodka."

"Good, clean art from the Molly Murphy Collection"

"Sure. I know of a haystack on the edge of town where you'll be safe until the heat dies down."

octopus knitting a jumper...

Acupuncturist Society Cocktail Party - 'For heaven's sake, Brian, it's only a pineapple chunk!'

Acupuncture clinic

'Maybe we could put our knitting down until the examination is over.'

'Aside from your plastic canvas projects, what else have you been doing since you retired?'

Nurse playing darts with syringes.

'And you all thought I didn't have a hobby.'

'I was thinking acupuncture might cure his laziness. . .'

'Are you admiring my embroidery, dear? To fully appreciate it you need these...'

Pin Cushion to roll of cotton: 'Hi! I'm a pin cushion! I love my job!' Pin Cushion's reply: 'MASOCHIST!'

'Now where did I put my knitting needles?'

'How long have you been out of work? I've never seen a resume prepared in needlepoint.'

'He fainted when he saw the needle.'

Acupunture Clinic opens next to a Ballon Animal shop.

"How may I hurt you?"

Maid with her sewing basket

Be polite to your acupuncturist at all times. A basic life lesson hard learned.

Multitasking

Bless this horse

"Nana" Technology

'Now where did I put my knitting needles?'

Scientist using his microscope to thread a needle to repair his torn shirt.

"I know you're just trying to be helpful, but why don't you let me decide where my acupunture needles should go?"

Acupuncture darts.