Navigating Economic Downturn Gifts

Fun with Underemployment

"Maybe now, we could look at customer care'?"

'All we can do is hope for identity theft.'

'Oh, no! It's all in euros!'

Paper Profits Break Glass In Case of Emergency.

"Sorry, but there aren't enough life jackets to go around."

'Now let's proceed downstairs and see where our stock shares presently sits,'

"And then, like an idiot, I turned to the boss and said 'Maybe the stock market isn't the only thing that's been overvalued!'"

'How long's he been out there?'

'Yes, I think you better had ask Santa for it. Because there's no way I could afford to buy it.'

'We don't have a mission statement. We have a survival plan.'

"Okay, the market took a dive. No reason to panic, Mr. Spielman."

You know retail is in a bad way when...

'And the good news is - we're in deep doo-doo.'

'Of course business is slow. Would we want it any other way?'

"Since they graduated, have any of your children moved back in with you?"

Nation of Has-Beens (and Never-Will-Bes)

"I asked Bill to accompany this presentation with something in a haunting minor key."

By camouflaging himself, Ed was able to avoid being a victim of the company's massive layoffs.

'If the market should go down really deep, I'll be well prepared!'

"I am reminded of a morbidly depressing anecdote. . ."

Vulture waiting outside a failing business.

'I run a small investment firm. Unfortunately, it used to be a large investment firm.'

Sign says: 'Please Help. Downshifting'

'Listen... that sound... we're scraping the bottom of the barrel.'

'Probably we will meet more often these days. Due to the crisis I am working overtime.'

Bank manager with no business has tumbleweed blowing into office.

Cadbury's "Recession" - Brown Ale Chocolates

'I thought it would be appropriate to have a magician as we went down.'

"Ms. Benton, please phone my wife and schedule a meeting with her for 3:00! I need a hug!"

"Get used to it...I think we're going to be eating them for a while yet..."

Social Networking Sites for the Unemployed

"By God, we'll pull out of this mess or I'm not Otto Von Bismark."

'Business is so bad even the shoplifters have stopped coming.'

'I felt it was my civil duty to come out of retirement.'