Naval Lingo Lover Pillows

'Well **** the **** and his ****. . . Sorry, I have one of our mouths.'

Servicemen.

Packed boats of families on a seaside holidays

'All I want for Valentine's Day is a Greek fisherman's cap.'

Pirate School: 'Today mateys we are going to study the three aarrrsss.'

Says here the Navy's going to be patrolling the South China Sea. It could spark a history-changing war. Google tells me the last time a Naval conflict changed history, it was the Battle of Midway. You were alive at that time. How awesome was it to already be ancient when Midway happened? I never expected a question like that from a prepubescent stooge like you. Was it as awesome as when you saw Cleopatra lose at the Battle of Actium? I see you're bringing Google's a-game today.

COWMIKAZES

'Carry on sailor, just keep swimming around the coast and stick your head up now and again.'

Commonly confused homonyms: Frigate and Frigate

Late Night with Patrick O'Brian

"Port outbound, starboard home."

'I've told you time and again, if you didn't east so fast, you wouldn't swallow so much flotsam.'

'Okay who swiped my bath toys?'

'It was only a joke. I never thought they's accept me.'

On board the MS Hepatology

"Relax, Marge! I'm sure the folks at 'Ultimate Pirate Adventures'. . ."

'A boy! Standing on a burning deck! I bet nobody did a risk assessment?'

Horatio Nelson

John Bull Devouring the French Navy

'THINGMY ON THE PORT BOW!! You know, what's it called? Long and pointy... Very fast... TORPEDO ON THE PORT BOW!!'

'This is a dolphin friendly boat.'

Veteran mistakes ironclad ship for Noah's Ark

Small airplane pulls spiral striping off lighthouse.

The Sinking of the Moskva

Have a very piratical Birthday

That foggy, closed-in feeling will dissipate soon, giving you a clear view of what is ahead.

'Well what do you know? There really is plenty of kitsch in the sea!'

"Large destroyer on the horizon, captain."

"#*@!% #*@!% #*@!%"

'A middle seat?! Just my luck!'

'What?! I barely touched him! He's pulling the old flopperoo!'

'And the poop deck isn't what it sounds like!...We've got a jon boat for that!'

The 'British Tar' of the Future (The Future of the Navy)

Whale lifts up submarine out of the water.

Oh U! The German Periscoper: "Ach Himmel! Dot most be der peutiful Ben Nevis of vich ve 'ave 'eard so mooch!"