Nautical-themed Humorist T-Shirts

"Attention all hands. Abandon ship!"

'Get the net ready, Alice. I think it's a big one.'

A huge shark is about to attack a small fishing boat and one of the guys is saying 'Listen... there's that creepy music again' as an orchestra of fish, crabs and an octopus play the theme from Jaws.

Crew Goofs Off While Out Of Sight

Bicycle sat nav.

"...for a canal I thought that was unusually short."

"My wife is the queen of misheard lyrics! Listen to her singing carefully next time: it's hilarious..."

Japanese Whaling

Captain Hook getting his hook stuck in the rail, again

"That's the last time I buy a dog from a cartoonist."

"I'm the Class Clown fish."

Well yes, I am a Blue Whale, but that doesn't mean I'm depressed...

"Ticket and passport, please."

"Captain, we've taken on strippers."

"This crew gets 15 miles to the pound of gruel. They're very fuel efficient."

'How long have you operated multi-engines, sailor?'

"Will thee not sayeth uncle?!"

"How can you feel queasy, we're barely out of port."

Tugboat tugging Iceberg

Lighthouse powered by batteries.

"Is a six pack enough? I can go back out."

"I was caught and released. But according to news reports, I remain a fish of interest."

"With the benefit of hindsight, I’d say no, Ed, it wasn’t ‘funny’ letting him steer the boat!"

'David, David, we're sinking! Our water bed has sprung a leak!'

Man painting MOM on boat

'Where do you want to go for breakfast, fancy an Australian or do you want to nip over to Hawaii?'

Walking the Plank.

'The trick to scaring surfers is to only show your dorsal fin when you surface next to them...'

'It followed me home, can I keep it?'

Raft with a 'Caution Wet!' sign.

"Let’s draw him closer to New Bedford — we’ll get cell service there and Instagram the heck out of this!"

'I'm not scaring the fish - I'm WARNING the fish!'

"Don't trust his tail—I know a scallywag when I see one."

'We're drifting apart.'

Fisherman selling sardines in oil, haddock in oil, cod in oil etc..