Nature Laugh Seekers T-Shirts

Timber!

"That'll be five bucks."

"Of course it's not clean energy -- We don't have clean ANYTHING!"

"Enough with the treehugging already!"

"You'll have to excuse my date. He spontaneously combusts from time to time."

"I told you to stop biting your nails."

'If a bear attacks and I have to play dead I want it to be as convincing as possible!'

'I don't understand. Why do you want to have your arms extended?'

"Let me guess...you forgot to put their hand-brakes on!"

"I finished my act. Could you come over and give me a hand?"

Marmalade the Cheetah on stilts.

'Can't understand all this fuss over cattle growth hormones.'

"Family vacation is an oxymoron."

"Have you tried the David and Goliath cocktail?"

"I'm having a dry October. . . October 2045."

"Right. Money isn't everything - what's the other thing again?"

'It's an obvious case of identity theft.'

'Listen, be fair, George - it's your TURN to take Mrs McCarthy for her lesson.'

'Don't worry about it, Son — Kleptomania runs in the family.'

"To be environmentally responsible I'm recycling my sister's old book reports."

"Don't drink that natural spring water! The aquifer's polluted with agrochemicals!"

Toast with tanlines

Unfortunately, the dominant lion was also a very picky eater.

'I do admire your honesty in your garden planning.'

"How much should I spend on a bottle of wine?"

"Yes, as a matter of fact, I have seen some lemmings."

Ernie was sick and tired of socks and jocks every Christmas.

"Here comes Bob - and remember, he's sesitive about the cooking shrinkage."

'We take concerns about billions of pounds of NHS fraud very seriously. In fact I've asked Nurse Miggins to sort it out as soon as she gets back from lunch!'

The Mid Morning Bird