National Volunteers Week Gifts

"So nice of you to offer to display our posters" "I didn't. My pastor made me"

'Before you see any patients have you completed your hand sterilisation and soap management course?'

"Be kind"

"We need volunteers for the car chasing fundraiser."

'Put a tick under 'very toxic'.' (New Orleans Toxic Clean-Up Team).

"I'm in nonprofit work for the money."

'He has a big heart. . . inviting his homeless friends in to stay dry.'

Meanwhile, in Florida: Little Free Library/Little Free Firearms

'You are a very good nurse. You're actually listening to what I'm saying.'

Handle With Care

"For my next trick, I'll need a volunteer, a fake knife, and a mirrored box with a secret compartment."

Achiever: An illustration of how many thoughts she can have in a split second, while still listening to him.

'Long shift?'

"I have special needs-- good food, warm bed, fresh water, and plenty of room to pop wheelies!"

"We'll have someone to help you as soon as we've recruited and trained them. Shouldn't be more than 5 or 6 years!"

"Hey, there's Sara, padding her college-entrance résumé!"

"I don't leave home without it!"

Separation

"We can't actually pay you, but your work will get a lot of exposure."

'She knew we'd try to talk her-out of it.'

Boy scout replaces Atlas during Bob-a-Job Week.

'For five years you can't get a single politician to take any notice of you...and then half a dozen turn up at once!'

"Tia Carmen, if times are tough, how come you're giving money away?"

"In times like these we all have to pull together, to work flexibly. We need to operate outside of our traditional roles for the greater good."

'Whoa! This was supposed to be an easy merit badge!'

'I'm a practical nurse! -- I know better than to listen to doctors!'

'I thought it might help you get your mind off things. It's a story of hope and survival. Nothing at all like your story.'

'...and now, Doctor, if you have satisfactorily disinfected your hands,...

'Today we will lock the monkey in a room...' 'Why do I volunteer for this?'

Cares and woes.

"After spending thirty years creating models of early universe formation, I began to suspect that my work didn't make a shred of difference."

Social Worker

More people working in Voluntary sector than 2010.

Interning in D.C. Volunteering in Seattle. Trekking in Nepal. Lucky ducks! I'm stuck here working 2 jobs! Wow! You're getting paid?!! Who knew? Employment is this summer's must-have status symbol. Some parents envy you.

"This one's for volunteering for field trips. This one's for planning the class holiday parties. . ."