National Debt Deep Diver Pillows

An Everyday Explanation of the Federal Budget.

Moses uses the burning bush to roast a kosher frank

Top Ten New Year's Resolutions

'That's where they keep all the money I don't have anymore.'

'I'm sorry, Collin, but our Dreyfus Mid-Cap fund completely tanked, so we're going to have to let you go.'

"I'm gonna ride it out!"

'Barry, I think I know where you left the champagne bottle.'

'Looks like you're underwater on your mortgage.'

Didn't know as much about the market as I thought I did.

"I'm here to fix the lasagne."

"Right, all those in favour of a car boot sale."

'That's because they won't let you die until you pay your student loans.'

"You owe us more than your house is worth. One of our depositors will be moving in with you to help even things out."

Euro-Meltdown

"We were worried about the carbon footprint from the charcoal - so we converted it to wind power."

Business jargon : 'significant negative growth' translated into : 'we are dead broke !'

Stress.

Kitchen chef

'I warned them! I told them the sky is falling! The sky is falling! But, this time nobody listened.'

'We're sending you back so that you can pay off your student loans.'

'My balloon mortgage blew up in my face!'

"Sergio, I know you let me borrow some money last year...and I appreciate it."

'Don't jump, McWit. Six countries just repaid their loans.'

Well, I'm not leaving.

'Any chance of a bailout?'

"What's for dinner, Madge? I'll be home soon."

Ran out of money.

"It's nice to know that you are able to live within your means but, as your financial advisor, I must point out that you're doing so by borrowing money."

'Money's so tight these days, it's harder to get into debt than out of it.'

All sizzle and no roast

'Quick, Lassie, our credit cards are maxed! Get help!'

'You idiot! I said don't forget to thaw the turkey!'

"Do we accept PayPay? We accept any method that pays, pal."

'Somehow, I consolidated all my debts into a ten-year sentence!'

"Good news! - I've just finished paying back my student loan...."