Narrative Detective Gifts

I found your memoir totally believable until that part at the end where I agree to publish it.

'I remember when you used to look for answers using your astute powers of deduction.'

"Evidence suggests she was working on the puzzle, got up to make tea, husband enters and puts last piece in..."

Sherlock Holmes selling Sherlock Holmes.

"Talk, Wallace - where'd you hide the loot?"

'Hello? Missing Persons?'

"I can't decide if we're good people who are bad at communicating, or monsters who communicate perfectly."

'Assuming their porridge was poured at the same time, how could it then be too hot, too cold and just right?'

"Your hunch was right, Officer Garcia. We'll need a good editor to clean up this manuscript and bring his unfinished novel to a satisfying conclusion."

Not to be a motion picture. Will remain just a book.

"Elementary, my dear Watson- the cartoonist did it."

Joan Hickson

The Elliot Ness monster.

A Vase has fallen on a cat's head. Are mice to blame?

'You know bank pens never work. Why didn't you write the holdup note before we left?!'

'Listen up, Baskerville! This is MacDonald! Those hounds of yours are scaring the E-I-E-I-O out of my animals!'

The mysterious Sherlock Holmes - 'Is he wearing his cap backwards or forwards?'

'I asked Will if he wrote it. He said he wasn't sure.'

It was my story. A murder mystery. A who-done-it-and-got-away-with-it-until-he-wrote-about-it.

'It's some more story ideas from Francis Bacon.'

'This is the worst film noir I've ever seen.'

"At some point, there's only so high you can raise the volume before you admit you're never gonna understand what British detectives are saying."

'I'm sure that the autopsy will confirm it was a suicide.'

The Philip Marlow family

'Who was the murderer? Well Watson, that's the killer question.'

"So, just to be clear: the 'voices inside your head' told you to launder the money from forfeited law enforcement seizures in exchange for federal tax breaks for your Uncle Mark in Costa Rica?"

Marriage a la Mode - Death of the Earl.

Sherlock Holmes Museum: No Hounds.

"That's hardly necessary!"

Sherlock Holmes with a magnifying glass.

'Oddly enough you're the third person to buy that today!'

'Turns out it was J K Rowling, in the drawing room, with a laptop.'

Mystery of the Poets

"Homes on Holmes"

'I believe the murderer is in this very room.'