Name Wizard Pillows

Tabloid Times. First there was "Bennifer," then "Brangelina" and "Tomkat." What if Cameron Diaz starts dating Spiderman? They'll be "Webcam"!

Pounding speeds up the computer.

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

'My penmanship has really improved since I got a laser printer.'

Ed Flanders, Deconstruction Worker

Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'

I will study my speling words...

"Bah, I could've written a better dénouement in my sleep."

"How is it that someone who reads all the Harry Potter books still doesn't know the magic word?"

"Bad dog! I've told you to always proofread."

Kid in class corrects teachers spelling.

Restaurant Francais: All you can pronounce £30.

"My novel is not a doorstop!"

Freind: 'Misspelled, anything helps.'

'You'll have to take an online company aptitude test, but if you're the designer we're looking for, you've already designed an app for that.'

Miss, how do you spell "acceptable"? I've Googled every "e" and can't find it.

Harry Potter learns some 'new tricks' on his first day enrolled in a public school.

'Roget it's fantastic, superb, extraordinary...where on earth did you get the idea?'

"Better than a business model, I have a business scheme."

"He's sworn never to say Boudicca, ShrOwsbury, whoM, or narrative."

"I know its hard to believe right now, Lawrence, but some day you'll thank me for asking you to punctuate your sentences correctly."

'The definition of OBSOLETE: old fashioned dictionaries.'

So I'm "cheap." It's a perfectly good word. And it aptly describes my interest in conserving resources. I suppose we could call you "thrifty." Heavens no! And waste two whole letters? I see we've only wasted one whole tea bag.

Conflating Science and Grammar. The boy threw the ball. What grammatical role does "ball" play in this sentence? An object in motion!

Ninedency: A budding tendency

"No sweetie, it’s a beurk not a book."

The Family Joules: Part 21

"My preferred pronoun is they."

"It's a play on words."

Woman holds report: 'This has so many different fonts in it, I thougt it was a ransom note.'

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, Kevin. You need to know them so you can Blog.'

'He's written some great slogans and some great labels, but he's never written a great coupon.'

'I swear by my spell checker. I have a mental block for spelling. Even 'Hooqued on Foniks' didn't help.'

Thesaurus Publishing: Out, Not here, Gone, Absent.

"For just one monkey in front of one typewriter you've come up with some amazing stuff."