Name Advocate Pillows

"'Dear Mrs. Zeus?!' The name's Hera!"

Trial by Media

"It seems my fear of death has been replaced by my fear of politics."

"Of course he's smiling. He's getting $15,000 to give a lecture on free speech."

Now leaving designated Free Speech Zone. Shut it!

"HR-bill 9495. Cutting down non-profits."

"No, of course there isn't, 'one law for the rich and another for the poor'... There's no law for the poor."

"For the girls—Kimberly, Caitlin, Lauren, Cindy, and Tracy. For the boys—Cameron, Christopher, Adam, Jeffrey, and Gregory."

Thank you, Essential Workers

Soldier armed with a pen.

'We'd like to form a support group for homework anxiety.'

Detention Center

Twitter censorship

The problem is, too many people aren't the least bit particular about their arrows.

Human Rights for All

"They're class action figures."

Freedom Book.

Tom Cruise

Comments. Complaints. Constitutional Amendments.

Autocensure

The truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.

"'Disability benefits' they said... Not while there are perfectly good jobs as traffic cones to be had!"

"SUPERintendent! What kind of powers do you have?"

"I'm not going to shoot the messenger, but I'm also not going to renew his grant."

The scales between gluttony and hunger

Weapens of Mass Instruction

"I thought I'd try a Marie Antoinette for a change."

"I'd like to report a case of historical sexual abuse in the sixties. I'd like to - but I can't!"

"Really? 'Yeller'? That's what you want to name him?"

'I'll have to keep my name after we're married.'

Books: Names That Will Make Your Child Hate You!

Horace Mann

"We're callin' 'im Bill, coz he came at the end of the month"