Mystical Insight Seeker T-Shirts

'Hang on, I'll just go and get my wide-screen crystal ball.'

"Mrs. Marsha Mullhouse, of Kenosha, Wisconsin, asks, "Are You subject to the laws of physics, or are the laws of physics subject to You?"

I.O.U. one pot of gold.

'I'm sorry, Madam Zola. I'm afraid you no longer have second sight.'

'I want to find out what the formula was I wrote yesterday on the blackboard and was erased by the custodian.'

A voodoo doctor.

"OK, now what's the meaning of the other eight?"

"Now, let’s talk about your attachment issues."

"That? Oh, it's last year's calendar."

"To listen to your instincts, press one."

"Are you blushing?!"

"I've got dominion, I've got dominion..."

"Evidence of Bigfoot or just some clown?"

'You will be reincarnated as someone who undergoes past life regression.'

'Fortunes, Impressions, Hunches, Wild Guesses'

'I still love you, but I think I should see other dragons.'

Frog Prince

A self-filling prophecy.

"Any kind of election is getting harder to call these days. . ."

"My first husband was Roland, 'The Human Cannonball', .... and then one day he didn't go ballistic."

'That's funny, I'd have sworn you were a medium.'

I just knew this would be dull.

'Our relationship isn't easy when she's always bringing up my past!'

"We're still working out the numerology for a name."

'Oh Wise One, I have but one question... why are we here?'

"I see a vague figure of someone groping...groping...groping..Yes, yes, it's coming in more clearly now! It seems to be—yes, it is a man! The man has a briefcase! And some papers! The man is an economist!"

Ouija board speaks recorded options

'I met that handsome, exciting stranger you warned me about...Now, I want you to tell me when I'll meet him again...'

"Will I pass the math test tomorrow, mom?"

'Hey! The audience wants you to stop sending spam thoughts!'

'I was afraid of this -- the evolution protocols are just confusing them.'

'Jeez! What comes after 'huff'?'

The newspaper that psychics read every morning.

'Before sending these ideas I have to the boss, run them past legal, my Ouija board and my magic 8 ball.'