Mystical Humor Enthusiasts Pillows

Wrong Address

'Any minute now I'll be getting a headache.'

'Oh, no - I have to read each tentacle - that'll be extra, of course.'

"I see a pretty lady who looks a lot like you....a very kind lady...and she's adopting what appears to be a box of adorable kittens!"

"Did you have a cat?"

"So how much money have you made from your psychic hotline business?"

'I'm sorry, Madam Zola. I'm afraid you no longer have second sight.'

'Before we begin, let me see what my fortune cookie says.'

Nikolay Rerih

'You will meet a sexy, honest fortune teller who will take all your money!'

'I see a carefree lifestyle by a quiet lake. No, wait, my mistake - looks like I called up the real estate section.'

'You see me coming here every week and paying you fifty dollars...'

Guru levitates while wife vacuums.

"I'm afraid your wife gets to say 'I told you so.'"

Dr. Prebish didn't always fit in with the other scientists.

"Add Your Own Caption Week # 222"

'You will go 3 for 5 tomorrow.'

Fortune Tellers Convention

"We don't do that kind of cattle futures, ma'am. You want Madam Mystic down the street."

'Reeta can tell your fortune from your bank statements.'

"...He appears to have stepped away from his body."

"All I'm saying is, why do we always have to sit on just one side of the table, all bunched up?"

'Listen I think we should break up...it's not you... it's that thing on your face.'

Elves' Union Presents Demands To Santa Claus

'According to your love line, I should be calling a cop right now!'

"Wow. That guy on psychic chat line is really good. He told me our next phone bill would be bigger than usual!"

'The crystal reveals you spend your money foolishly. That will be twenty-five dollars, please.

'This time last year you told me that I would meet a tall handsome stranger. Now I need his name and address.'

Man asking lady if she cares for him

"Vous voyez quoi pour l'avenir de l'humanité?"

"Out bending spoons at Pop's diner."

"If you never date a prediction it can't be proved wrong."

'Again. . . why are we expelling these two?'

"It's a bit of a scam. They sell the crystal ball at cost, then nail you on the price of replacement psych-ink cartridges."