Mycology Gifts

'You are right; it does appear to be some kind of a fungus.'

"They're designer plaid, for God's sake. How poisonous can they be?"

"Waiter, there's a fly agaric in my soup."

"He was always so sweaty."

"Fred, I think you're spending altogether too much time down here with these mushrooms!"

Magic Mushrooms

'You look like a fun guy!'

'You'll find there's no connection. Some that are comfortable to sit on are not safe to eat, and some that are not comfortable to sit on are safe to eat.'

"Yeah, yeah, laugh! You see, my cave is dark, warm and damp, so every Spring, when I wake up, I'm covered in fungi..."

Chestnut Mushroom

Toadstool

Disease Management

"Tour de Frank"

'But Timmy, you have to eat your antibiotics, or you'll never become a big and strong bacteria.'

Scientist counting microscopic things he can see in his microscope

Comicron

'Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who is the fairest algologist of all?'

"I'm going to get you fired."

'That which does not kill me, make me stronger.'

Down a the lab - Germs "So what will you do when you grow up?" "Oh the usual...divide,multiply,infect,kill.."

An experimentalist alarms his guests by describing the appearance of the mushrooms in a dish they have just eaten.

"Pssst! - Gerald, you've mutated again. . ."

DNA Analysis.

'That new antibiotic seems to be working. Time to evolve again.'

Gene Therapy

'It's a deal. You don't infect me, and I don't infect you.'

"That new antibiotic seems to be working. Time to evolve again."

'Since Fleming already beat you to it with penicillin, I take it we can dispose of your week-old sandwich?'

There's Nothing Worse Than A Staff Infection

Footballer and Bacteria.

Viral Pathology Center (janitor finding three dead bodies)

"Hey!-This looks like a good place!"

"Are you sure this is a 'Flu virus?" "See for yourself...it's nose is running!"

'You tell me how to give them a fever, and I'll tell you how to make them cough.'

Cell splitting - don't do that.