Musical Advisor T-Shirts

Focus Groupies

Trump! The Musical

"Do you have any of those books that understand men?"

Red Letter Days - A declaration of love in public

"Same story every morning - 'Can you come and fix our windmill?'..."

Annie, the Reptile version: 'The sun will come out tomorrow! Tomorrow! You will sun yourself tomorrow!'

Children in fancy dress on the way to music lessons

"They'll be expecting adagio. Go with the allegro."

Alberich steals the gold

Music Hall Dancers

Proposal

Sir Conrad Murgatroyd

Daughters at Bedtime

"O.K., next time around let's ease up on the vibrato."

Paris, 1922, George Gershwin and Franz Kafka try to write a musical.

"Well if it doesn't matter who's right and who's wrong, why don't I be right and you be wrong?"

There were a million things Alexander Hamilton hadn't done

Fricka arrives.

"Home school marching band"

'The hills are alive with the sound of moo-sick!'

"Javert" Would Like To Use Your Current Location

"Yes, 'the lion sleeps tonight', I know the tune, but it means it's had a good feed during the day, which is not really a good thing..."

"It was so depressing. When I go to the theatre, I want to be entertained."

West End Shows closing - box office piled high with boxes.

"You're absolutely sure my wife won't be able to find this?"

"Randy the love doctor, what ails you, brother?" "My wife wants us to renew our vows and have a big ceremony." "But I'd rather save that money for retirement. Should I tell her to go take a hike?" "Of course." "That way, there's a good chance you won't have to worry about retirement at all." "Exactly. ...Wait, what do you mean by that?"

"Now, last time, near the end of Ravel's 'Bolero,' I heard a scream."

"You took a vow of poverty, celibacy and silence. But aren't they the marriage vows."

'No comment for now, but there will be a press leak at four.'

'Greatest Hits Compilations not yet turned into a terrible Ben Elton show.'

"It's not what you think."

Pirate King