Music Lover T-Shirts

Dog using MP3 player scowls at dog that's still listening to gramophone player.

A bow eating 'Rosin Bran'

Piano-Tuning Bar

"We've got Tom O'Brien on bass, Nick Weber on drums, and Jonah Petchesky on contracts."

"Personally, I prefer a piano bar."

"The next one is a hard-rockin', kick-ass, take-no-prisoners tune we wrote about turning sixty."

'I hate these purists who play Bach without any pedal'

"This next one is a typical blues number about exceeding your data plan limit, cracking your ipad screen, and losing your new ear buds."

"I think this calls for a little banjo."

'This next block of silence is for all you folks who download music for free, eliminating my incentive to create,'

'It's the latest technology. A Pacemaker/MP3 Player. That's where you plug in your earbuds.'

'You have an irregular, catchy heartbeat.'

"We're going down to the skate park to annoy the kids, are you in?"

'What makes you think I'm not listening?'

Non-relaxation CD's for narcoleptics.

'This next song is about oil. Then again, isn't everything?'

Bacterial Culture

'And on backup...'

'You're out of key, and you've totally picked the wrong number for your vocal range. Face it, you'll never make it as carol singers'

"Any requests?"

The Music of Life (in the key of dna).

"I see the radiator's Baroque again."

'When I use my iPod, my implantable defibrillator kicks in.'

Changing times for minority businesses.

"I only accept students with natural talent. Your kid's talent is unnatural."

'My next selection is a protest song against piano lessons.'

D.J. Vu

'Take a look at the chart and tell me your pain level on a scale of 1 to 10.'

'My foreplay isn't working anymore is it, Angela?'

'We should have bought the piano first, and built the igloo around it.'

'You sure it not Triceratops? It have three horns.'

Goldilocks drives an audio tech insane.

'We call him the semi-conductor - he only works part time.'

Band made of a sheep guitarist, cow saxophonist and rabbit singer

'When I grow up, I plan to major in music downloading and digitizing,'