Music Industry Executive T-Shirts

'CD's' on the rollercoaster of money.

You don't have to be tone deaf to work here but it helps.

'Hey Harry, let me run this past you: Rock Revisionism...'

If John Lennon had gone into strategic management.

The Artist Share of the Golden Goose Internet

"Do you see yourself becoming a movie in five years?"

George Martin

'Dubble Dawawg A.K.A. Diplo Matt A.K.A. Spyral A.K.A. Sheldon delman - noted rap artist'

"This next song is about narrow-minded record executives and their reluctance to take a chance on anything a bit different."

Brian, I hope you're taking this seriously.

"It's supposed to be a comedy, so I've had Steve, here, red-flag the funny parts."

"The script is flimsy, the action scenes implausible and the plot would insult the intelligence of a three year old."

"You know that kid that submitted a screenplay to us on the back of a restaurant menu? I'm passing on it. I like the screenplay, but I hate that restaurant."

"I LOVE this business! Just when you think you've discovered our culture's lowest common denominator, along comes a crazy genius like you to show us how wrong our math was!"

"I just sold my entire back catalogue of songs for $185 million."

"Coming up... more of the same mindless pop songs with repetitive lyrics and nauseating melodies!"

"When you said you were high up in the the music business..."

'It's 'big office' meets 'poorly-received flop'!'

This next number is when we smash our guitars...

"Hear me out. Batman - again."

"Kanye's changing his name. I'm thinking he should go by Cra Z."

"California has always been too big for its britches."

"Look, babe. At this point, you've reinvented yourself so many times you're back to who you were at the start."

"Hey, this is brilliant! Where do you get my ideas?"

'The music business.'

Godzilla vs. The Angry Movie Executives

"Can you perform under pressure?"

'You look and sound like a real pro.'

Movie Franchise

'Your album is now the number one donation to charity shops.'

"When I was young, music and lyrics were important! Now it's all about production...it's all jiggly butts, smoke, sexy clothes and crazy videos!"

Rescuing the Music Industry.

"The role is subtly nuanced and the person we choose has to bring a sense of 'lots of money for the producers' to the part."

Simon Cowell

MEGASTUDIOS, INC., 'I've GOT it! - Winnie-the-Pooh VERSUS the Smurfs!'