Museum T-Shirts

'Cheer up Don! Everybody starts at the bottom.'

'Of all the nerve!...Making us sit through the whole of their Bayeux Tapestries!!'

Curators at the Louvre Museum would regret approving the installation of a work on a wall behind the Mona Lisa.

'Take me to your David Bowie exhibition.'

The Relentless March of Time

'And here, the artist is clearly making an ironic statement about the fleeting nature of material possessions.'

Sacrifices at 4:00PM and 6:00PM

'Probably would have tasted like chicken.'

'What do you suppose he's trying to say?'

Man Overly Enjoys the Nude Artwork in a Gallery

'Great news Marcel! Proof that it's a genuine Leonardo!'

Art Museum Handicapped Parking Signs.

'I was doing better stuff than that when I was three years old.'

'I don't like all that staring...'

'Oh I'm keeping abreast of it.'

Rubens Exhibition Souvenirs.

"Beats me why but my girlfriend says I have a one-track mind."

'I think they're old phones...from from when people used to just talk into them.'

'I think it's called RED!'

Museum

British Museum: "There's nowt British in there!"

"They have the best emojis."

"Weird! It's like you can read my mind"

After Hours at the Museum. Don't even think about it!!

"I bagged this one in a museum."

Archeologist Deciphers Limerick Heiroglyphs

"Thrilling news, sweetie! The National Gallery's entire collection of Velázquez is now attributed to you."

"What the %@!!* is that?!" "Is that a leg? Wait—no, it's an arm. Wait—what?" "The frame is nice." "Whatever it is, it makes me miss Bob Ross." "Gasp!" "The intentionally lost Caravaggio"

"Now on view: Old paintings by dead white men through whenever…"

"For some reason, this one really speaks to me."

Who are you?

Museum. It's great we got this job moving statues here at the museum. CRASH! That was no time to make a joke about a "piece of art."

Clothing museum. What would you say if someone asked you to invent an alternative to the button or zipper as a closer? It'd be a snap.

'I really don't see the point?'

"It's a forgery―and a recent one, too."