Movie Trivia Expert Gifts

Stan Mack's Real Life Funnies: Apples, Oranges and Lemmons

"E.T. phone home... Now!"

Herman Mankiewicz

Papageno from The Magic Flute

Marilyn Monroe - Spot the Difference

'Did you watch the horror movie?'

"You talkin' to me? You talkin' to me? Then who the heck else are you talking... you talking to me?"

'What a strange episode -- they just voted Ricardo Montalban off the island!'

'So, ten thousand pounds could be yours if you call in and answer this question...Why the hell aren't you in bed?!'

'This has been a Chris Wallace special report -- we now switch you back to Mike Wallace....'

'There are facts,there are factoids, and there are just plain fun facts.'

"You asked to see me, boss?" "Yes, Rudy. We have a serious problem here." "I'm going to need you to stop humming the 'Star Wars' theme 24/7." "Disney is notoriously litigious. If they catch wind that you're publicly performing the theme, they may sue the cafe for royalties." "Daaaa... daaaa... duh-duh-duh daaaaaaa... daaaa... duh-duh-duh... wait, what?" "If you cost me my livelihood, I'll do to you what Han did to that Tauntaun."

It's academic

Nicholas Parsons RIP

'Bill remembers where he was everybody died.'

"I'll have a vole, please Carol"

'On tonight's news: Katie Couric interviews Katie Couric.'

"Shouldn't have bought a touch-screen TV."

"Who's the actress that's married to the guy who was in that movie about cops with the actor who starred with the woman in that TV show about doctors?"

"You were never in The Birds..."

'And who are your chosen subjects?'

Welsh countdown

"They're called leftovers, not 'reruns'."

Sitcom News 'Hey, Marcia! Where's that darn news! I can't find it anywhere!'

"Don't you know what happens to the naive blonde who goes into the dark cellar? Have you not read the script?"

"Any idea what's on the TV?"

Cue-card holder auditions.

Trivia Pursuit

'It's a smart TV - it only turns on for Mastermind.'