Movie Commentator Pillows

I'm here with movie expert, Mister Flick, to discuss monsters who are actors. Let's start with Jekyll and Hyde. He does some good work and some bad work. Who picks scripts well? Dracula finds roles he can really sink his teeth into. Frankenstein, on the other hand, will take just about any part! What about King Kong's career? It was brief but he did climb to the top! And some critics think the Invisible Man is among the best. I agree with that ... but he only does low-budget indie films

No, you idiots, they don't include a "comments" section.

"Let's talk film or let's not talk film - I'm easy."

'Frankly, I think watching paint dry has been given a bad press.'

"The regular Fox news commentator was canned for being too soft on Iran. I'm Dick Cheney."

Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup? A scene from an Esther Williams movie.

"And the winner is… Dan the Man by a nose!"

"Whoever made Keir Starmer did a sound professional job."

Standard endings for sci-fi movies...

"‘Click’, you have reached the White House, press 1 for shameless groveling, 2 for presidential pardons, and please have your credit card details ready..."

'...And now, the film most criticized for eroding traditional family values, the nominees are...'

What do you say we team up to star in a sequel to "The Elephant Man" called "The Wolverine Boy"? !

'Cartoonist thinking'

"Still, he might be remembered as the 'no cloning' President."

"Look out, Luke Grasswalker! Irascibility leads to the dark side of the force. . . right into a hamburger bun."

"But the good news is Trump has broken off diplomatic relations with them only on Twitter..."

'I'm terribly worried, Doctor - he doesn't talk back to Bill O'Reilly any more.'

'He hasn't played a game yet, but there are people who have started whinging about him already.'

Sports Radio in Crisis

Oscars 2024

Carl Shurz's attacks on President Grant are 'Played Out'

"The script is flimsy, the action scenes implausible and the plot would insult the intelligence of a three year old."

"Lord, save my ass from this Russia debacle, please!"

Lord of the Rings IV.

"We've stared at the election map for so long it's become a Magic Eye poster."

Sir Patrick Moore.

"Face it - in this town, either you're a star or you're just another brown dwarf."

"You played yourself in your last picture. Everyone found it unconvincing."

Dispute between Pelosi and Trump

The National Institute for Advanced Talk-Show Punditry.

True Story Movie

Tree of Public Opinion.

"Let's wait for it to come out on cable and then not watch it."

"We've now got a higher approval rating than the media."

And now, for a rebuttal.