Mouse Sympathizer Pillows

'And I thought I had a big egg to lay.'

Bear fumbling whilst fishing.

'Geoffrey's Tourette's is acting up.'

"The government doesn't understand me."

"I'm sorry I hurt your feelings. Here, try this."

'Why can't you just chew bones like other dogs?' (dog smoking pipe).

'I wanted to hear the pita pata of tiny feet so he bought me a hamster.'

Mouse to occupant about trap: 'How could you?'

"Who the hell keeps doing that?"

'Hmmm, the 27th you say... Yes, I'm away that day, so I guess it's OK for you to play...'

Dog dreams of sleeping in masters chair.

"There you are!"

'If you can hear me, Larry Gligstein, please send a text to 555-703-7193

"Ugh, tell me about it! They pressure you to be a good boy and I get unreal expectations of prettiness!"

Cat thrusts note through mousehole that reads 'Can't we talk about this?'

"I taught him to shake hands, and now he's running for congress!"

'Buster was in a little accident, but he'll be good as new in 6 weeks.'

"Stop trying to change me!!"

“I've come to believe that I'm powerless over tennis balls.”

"It's no bed of mice and string for me either."

Man to complaints clerk: 'My dog just died and I think my wife's cheating on me.'

'Seems a bit drastic, don't you think?'

Phobias.

Sorry to hear about your accident.

"Star light star bright please let me wake up tomorrow and be a cat so I can sleep more and won't get my heart broken so much."

'Stop Fred, don't taunt this one: He's a guide dog...'

"Life at the ant farm was horrible! All the walls were see-through: no privacy!"

Cat Attitude

'Don't worry Vicar. He's only looking at you like that because you're eating off his plate...'

'I can't find my glasses!' 'I can't find my mobile phone!'