Motivated Manager Pillows

'You're at that awkward age, Danforth, still thinking of promotion.'

"What? We owe our big profits to our motivated workforce and not our shareholders? Why wasn't I told this??"

'I clawed my way to the top and then I clawed my way back to the middle.'

'I've stepped on so many people for the last 20 years to get where I'm at, and I'm still only a middle manager.'

"I'm Jackson, your new micro-manager."

"And finally, I'd like to take any questions from the floor."

"I always try to give out at least one genuine compliment per day. I don't always succeed."

"Best project manager we ever had."

'On your marks. Get set. Go!' - 'Come on! Keep going! You can do it!' - 'Yay! You're 8 hours closer to the grave!' - 'Oh, God.'

Dave realised that Clive didn't see problems,only 'challenges to be embraced'.

When we believe together we achieve together.

'Great idea, Philpott. Wish you'd thought of it.'

'A good leader can lead them to water, but a great leader can also make them drink.'

Office Politics

'The Rush Orders department is a shambles, Briggs, and I think you're just the man to turn it around,'

We're one big happy family here. What I'm looking for is a man who can make it work.

"Why don't you try learning from your own mistakes?"

Suggestion box: 'Build a bigger Complaints box'.

Sinking sales

People, what a fantastic opportunity for a reset!

"Corporate thinks it's time we updated our motivational strategies."

Course 'Management Skills and Employee Motivation', 09 AM - 05 PM, No breaks!

"Yes, we do have an incentive scheme - fall below that line and you're sacked."

'You're my best employee. You're punctual, ambitious and precise. The problem is ... it scares the devil out of my other employees.'

"I'm glad my team places me on a pedestal."

'I guess it was a mistake to make them self-starting.'

'Try as I may to get my ducks in a row, here's always some turkey stepping out of line.'

Support, Encourage, Inspire.

'I like to reward my employees for doing a good job. That's why I keep treats in my pockets when I walk past the cubicles.'

"Can you run that past me again, Watson - you seem to have lost me."

'A raise might destroy their initiative. The good old carrot and stick bonus keeps them focused.'

'Isn't it how you learnt to swim?'

'We're not exactly sure why it works yet but his productivity is up 50.'