Motherhood Muser T-Shirts

"You're what?!"

"I see that he is growing as fast as your law firm."

'I don't want him experiencing anything until I've totally checked it out.'

Weekday Morning Hell Bingo

"I only travelled with my umbilical cord!"

"I'd like to get my hands on whoever coined the phrase 'sleeps like a baby'."

Man dreams of romance whilst a woman dreams of romance and babies.

Chez Nous Menu

"Those are the names of your children? I went a different route...I memorized my kids' names."

"No wonder babies are born screaming. I haven't had a wink of sleep since the exit light came on!"

'She finds it really easy to juggle her kids with her career now she's joined the circus.'

1847 - Bram Stoker, creator of Dracula was born in Dublin.

"Mom! Don't think of me as covered with sand. Think of me as sugar coated."

'I'm keeping a scrap book. All I've got so far is one umbilical cord.'

"Just kick back and enjoy this. These are the nest years of our lives!"

Doris K. Elston: Brain Surgeon, Professional Model, Artist, Lawyer....Plus Mother of Four.

'Are you pregnant? How do you know? You look terrible!'

"I'm not eating cookies before dinner. I'm having cookies for dinner!"

"What makes you think I'm dripping it on my shirt?"

"I told you. . . use your inside miming."

Suffering from Cooties?

Nothing like traveling hundreds of miles to immerse yourself in art for the sole purpose of killing time between meals.

Same Day Delivery: "I wish!"

Mother Nature

'It's midnight, do you know where your brain is?'

Lamb Noise.

"We're ecstatic about our new au pair."

"Ideas that jump from noggin when head not yet screwed on."

Fertility goddess. Nanny goddess.

"It's so nice to finally put a face to the name."

No kicking: 12-6 Mon-Sun

"He's such a fussy eater."

"Be sure and eat your frozen vegetables."

"Sarah has two mommies and both of them are good cooks."

'Don't be alarmed if you hear the toilet flush a lot. Since you don't feel well, I thought I'd wash the dishes for you.'