Mother's Day Celebration Pillows

'Sorry about the delay with your breakfast mam...but when the Firefighters leave I will be back on track.'

'Just say it's stick-to-your-ribs food. Don't mention what else it's stuck to.'

"Surprise!"

"Lassie, go get help!" "Oh Timmy you idiot! Not again!"

"It's amazing, Darlin', just how fast the kids grow up!"

City Zoo: Day Care

"How can you be out of wings?"

Playing Fetch.

"Tell me about this fear of couches."

"Her first word was 'paparazzi'. "

The Busy Gardener

'Couldn't Peter claim Mr. McGregor's garden was an 'attractive nuisance?'

Lady using paint roller as rolling pin for baking dough.

Domestic Superheroes!!

"Is he talking yet? I was hoping he could help me with my new phone."

I like the Jets...I guess

"Don't worry, dear. You'll grow."

"Hold it right there, ma'am! If you get too close to the artwork, I'll have to ask you to leave the gallery."

'What would your mum say if she saw you drawing all over the wall like that?'

'Please tell me you're baby sitting?'

'I stay trim because of high metabolism. Theirs, not mine.'

'Why don't they make thumb-flavored baby food?'

'Personally I take all these programmes with a pinch of salt.'

Mum and baby both have pacifier.

"I spilled a red dot of paint, so I painted the whole room so you wouldn't notice it."

'Are you finished eating yet, sweetie?...Guess that answers THAT question!'

'I'd say he's 10 percent 'pet' and 90 percent 'Lord and Master of All He Surveys'.'

"I know what this is, it's what mum and dad call 'working from home'...

"Someone once told me that kids grow up so quickly. I hope there's some truth to that."

"Frankly, now that he's an obnoxious teenager, I find it more and more difficult to muster the urge to protect him..."

"They grow up so fast."

'Einstein, the children are getting too complex for me.'

A woman standing beside a stove full of steaming pots and pans.

You can't just switch them. If your wife asked you to change the baby, she probably meant the diaper.

Typical Brain Versus Einstein's Brain