Mosquito Maven Pillows

'I agree O-positive is rather nice, but my favourite by far is AB-negative...'

Muscles

'We're gonna need a bigger moat...!'

"Forget sugar and spice and everything nice. I'm going for buns of steel!"

Save the unicorn.

"The Leonardos, the Raphaels, Titians, Veroneses, Giottos... Italy wants them back, all 427 of them."

A sign that reads "ART...and plenty of it!" hangs above the entrance to a museum.

"You'll have to forgive Roland. He still uses 'stomach' and 'abdominals' interchangeably."

'We unfortunately had to compress our dinosaur area due to budget cuts. On the bright side, TyrannoTriStegoApatoHadroPlesioSaurodon Rex here is now the museum's most popular exhibit.'

Guide reading book called 'A farewell to arms.'

Man posing on beach as women ignore him.

The sunglasses.

Carbon Dating

The hall of bad ideas.

"He had the Guggenheim in mind, I think."

The Exhibition at the Royal Academy

Friends of the Royal Academy - Annual Dinner

Pigeons fly into an art museum and perch on sculptures.

'Sorry, you're just not built right for weightlifting.'

Weight lifter using his foot to take a photograph.

"Now we're leaving the hall of stuff we stole from other cultures and entering the hall of stuff we paid too much for."

Body Building Mishap

Facial hair continental drift.

Life is ghoul

"Yes, the migration flight home is always faster, but it's thanks to the prevailing winds, not just because we're keen to get home..."

A man takes a selfie with an Egyptian mummy

"... No, when I say, 'you must let go of the past' I mean you must return that vase to the museum you took it from."

"That metallic grinding means her throwout bearings are shot. She's backfiring through her carburetor. The tick indicates transmission trouble, and the smoke means she's on fire."

'This one's titled, 'Artist's Block'.'

'It's the people downstairs again.'

strong man bends an iron bar

"I love strong coffee."

"Can you guess how much it will be worth after you die?"