Morning Show Fan T-Shirts

'Please do not adjust your set -- I'm just a little hung over.'

Adam and Eve on a Talk Show

"Tell me, Chuck, is barbarism the natural state of mankind, and will it ultimately triumph?"

Evolution of a coffee drinker.

'Straight eye for the queer guy.'

My secret of living to 103? I stay active throwing out junk mail and alert dueling with telephone sales people!

Big Newspaper Delivery

Running Latte

1,572 Performances.

'Now stay tuned for 'Hope - Myth or Reality', to be followed by 'Reality - Hope or Myth'.'

"Dad, will you play judge and tell me if Raymond or Joey is the father of my baby doll?"

'Do you want toast with that?'

Men discussing a book on a chat show

"So, colony collapse disorder - how funny is it?"

"You've got to move. The bed is needed for another TV drama."

"I'm more of a day owl."

"Well I think the Real question is..."

"Hurry, I've been waiting for you."

"Well, it's another brand-new day. What do you say to getting up and looking the damn thing straight in the eye?"

"I still jump out of bed every morning. I just don't stick the landing as often."

'You're beat. Maybe you need to wake up to a better morning news team.'

"I see myself as a lot like Garbo, but very much a people person!"

"Honey, could you pass me the cow."

'On the contrary-I quite enjoy that Monday morning feeling!'

Retired Talk Show Host.

'So...you claim Farmer Jones kept you locked up naked in a dirty sty, fed nothing but garbage and repetitively called you a filthy swine!'

"Emotional breakdown! Call Oprah!"

"Good coffee."

Life is better with a laugh track and graphics.