Morning Ritualists T-Shirts

Three witches standing around a carafe in a coffee machine, waiting for it to fill

"I spend my day prepping for a good night"

"Amen. . . void where prohibited by law."

"My favorite way to start the day...coffee, danish, and a data dump."

"I feel like pushing the envelope this morning, honey, starting with a little grape jelly for that bran muffin."

"... And bless my dog, Penny, whose licks give me the strength to carry on."

"Incredible! Once again, you've made the perfect piece of toast."

"Great coffee, Carole."

'I'm a perfect little angel while I'm asleep. It's being awake that causes me trouble.'

So Far So Good

"Lemme guess: You're struggling with the French press again."

"Don't talk to me before discover coffee."

Father nursing his sick child

"He can't be disturbed right now. He's in a meeting with his first cup of coffee."

"It's pumpin spice latte season - I feel it in the air."

Daily Grind Coffee Cup

Vanity artist

"Would you mind getting me the Ambien, the Tiger Balm, three cookies, a cup of tea and a pillow for my legs?"

"You doomscroll, I make coffee, and together we forge bravely into each new day."

Nothing like that first cup of coffee, eh, Frank?

"What better way to start your day than to eat and pray before we play!"

Man looking at his shower-bath on a cold morning

"Take me to your barista."

'I've learned that adding water to coffee only weakens the effect.'

'Didn't you know that I read the comics every morning before I take the newspaper to Master?'

"Are you regular?" "Every morning at 6AM." "That's good." "But I don't wake up until 7."

"You should know better than to give a speech in the morning before you've had your coffee."

'How long has what been going on?'

'Nothing like a cup o' Joe before you mow.'

"This computer uses artificial intelligence to think like a human being...so it needs coffee in the morning to get it going!"

"Oh, he's a darling alright: he gets up early every spring and gets me a freshly brewed coffee for when I wake up...

'Wednesday wave.'

Eye Opener