Monkey Handler Pillows

'I'm afraid he's learned another disgusting habit.'

"Yes. I said 2 by 2, but you needed to use 2 by 4s for the Ark...begin again."

"If you ask me, wearing these things only makes them nervous."

'Boy, watch out for that pursestring suture!'

'Hi! I'm on the tree.'

'If only Darwin could have seen this.'

"I'm not a doctor, but I don't think the problem is with your bladder, Bob."

"I'm interested in working with animals and deliveries."

"Influence this."

'There! Now he's tied to my satisfaction and ready for surgery!'

Street Organ - Monkey

'Rex! Have you been counting the sheep again?'

'I don't know. It's too busy.'

'Shakespeare's Hamlet word for word - and I who always thought it was a crazy joke.'

"There you go with that typical police mentality."

"He did it!"

'Please repeat, your last transmission was garbled.'

'Look, if we're going to make this business work, we need to stop eating all the stock.'

'We could make a fortune teaching Parkour you know...'

"Good grief, Wilson! At least act like you're enjoying it! It's for my blog!"

'Bad news! We're hamsters!'

"Peter quickly learns the limitations of his new hamster ball."

Shakespeare Project

Cold Enough to Freeze Brass Monkeys.

'This is not what I expected when you said we were going to help an endangered species...'

Saggy Boobs Make Great Bungee Ropes for Bored Hamsters.

"3:14 p.m. Suspect drives to lakeside resort. Rents rowboat under false name. Tosses evidence into... wait, how do I tell anyone?" Topper: Undercover police dog

"Hear no evil? See no evil? Speak no evil? You're all hired!"

'Come, Darling! Let us give in to our most primal urges!'

Ape Lab. Really?! Those guys are going to test our intelligence?! They want to see if we'll use a ladder to get the banana. They say they're testing our problem-solving ability. Hey, Frank, we can't do the experiment today ... The ladder won't fit through the doorway!

A recurring crisis at the Farkinski farm

"Then maybe you should just tell me what you want for your birthday instead of saying you don't care."

"She barks once for drugs, twice for weapons, and ten times for candy bars."

'He's a sniffer dog-trained to sniff out dope.'

"I don't get it - he wasn't with us when we started."