Monk Enthusiast T-Shirts

"Your father and I just want you to know that we're behind you one hundred per cent should you decide to go back to being a dope addict."

'You can read, right? -- I want you to check this thing for loopholes.'

"... and I have a follow-up question regarding rawhide."

boy plugging leak in a barrel with his finger

"I want him to have the serenity to accept the things he can't pee on, the patience to pee on the things he can outside, and the wisdom to know the difference." "But I'll probably just take him to a trainer."

"Ooh, ooh, I know this koan! I got it! Pick me! Pick me!"

"Oh, great - They changed the Meaning of Life again."

'He was just saying that all things come to him who waits and, sure enough, along came a lightning bolt.'

'The World will speak hip-hop tomorrow.'

"Ok, let's get those knuckles up off the ground, arms way up high now, feet wide apart. . ."

'Uh, Dad - My wife thinks she and I should have a mountain of our own.'

'You just don't know when to stop, do you?'

'Oh, I'm not a guru -- I'm just big on personal space.'

Funky Facts: Monkeys.

'Spell checker!'

"I change my mantra every two months so no one can hack my soul."

Cleric with bible briefcase.

Mea Maxima Cuppa

'The secret to great wealth and spiritual contentment? Ok, hold on...I think I've got an app for that..'

Quills - Sizes 1-9

ZOO

'I wonder how Curious George fits into all this?'

'The Brothers of the Order of Saint Orson, patron saint of fried foods'

'Want to make it two out of three?'

'I'll be back in three or four months - Hold that thought.'

Just back from the psychological research center, Stanly couldn't help but think that he lived with a bunch of baboons.

Monk Prompt

Well la de da. . .

'Sorry mate. Your church doesn't meet the minimum building code.'

'All it needs is a ceiling fan.'

Guru about mountaintop covering: 'My wife knitted it.'