Momentum Maniac Gifts

A Newton's cradle wrecking ball.

'My feet are killing me.'

'I pledge allegiance to the atom, and to the periodic table on which it stands, many particles indivisible, with orbitals and electrons for all.'

Mister Bundles VS. The Martians - Part Eighteen

E-vac-u-ate! E-vac-u-ate! . . . I've just farted. . ."

"I'm weighed down with so many gadgets, I'll need a push to start me off."

"You might be interested in our encounter group for people with transmission problems."

Giant slug attacks a city

Three Ladies

Cow Cong vs Toilet Rolls.

100k Desert Crawl

'Geez, I hate these fun runs!'

'We come in peace. Unless, of course, you have stuff that we want.'

"Oh, oh - it's getting into organic."

'We're almost 1/8th of the way there.'

"Wow! - Do all Earth people look as tasty as YOU do?"

"Hang on - I'm not as young as I used to be. . .!"

Oblivious at 20,000 Feet

"This invasion is gonna be a piece of cake. Look, they're already surrendering."

A tessellation of running figures.

'C'mon! Visit me on the web!'

Angels crying because they lost first place to a big butch man

"I want to be upfront. At this point, I'm only looking for a casual hookup of Frankenstein."

'I'll wait for Harold one more year. He hasn't crossed the finish line yet from the 1932 Olympic's marathon.'

Love Hurts

"The key is to keep the momentum going when you're establishing the base of the snowman..."

Runner's High, Runner's Low

"Rum and coke...why, what do you drink on a fun run?"

Lox Ness Monster

"Well, buddy....a lot of people are missing that. Just look at the social media comments."

'Oh mate, I can't wait for the zombie apocalypse!'

Gym. At some point you're going to have to raise the bar.

The Fun Run.

'And then when I push this button it magnetizes the ions and...'

'Jogger's nipple'