Modification Master T-Shirts

Suddenly Jimmy didn't feel so alone in the world.

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

"What's a debenture?"

"I drink just enough coffee to make me think I can do my job."

'Asynchronous, collaborative, interactive - we're obviously on a roll.'

'We're making progress. I just got a firm 'maybe'.'

Cut out and keep your own Frank Sinatra.

"It's confusing when everybody has a pointer."

'No, I'm not the sommelier; in fact, I don't even work here - I've just always wanted to try this wine.'

Jeff soon discovered his mistake in ordering the one ton soup.

"'Meetingpalooza' sounded better in the brochure."

'Sure you won 'Contractor of the Decade' five times, McWit, but what have you done lately?'

"I want to leave myself some caloric margin of error for dessert."

"I love these off-site business meetings."

'I want to discuss communication clarity.'

Curling your hair for no reason

We called this meeting to decide your torture, Mr. Jones. Then we realized we could kill two birds with one stone by making this meeting eternal.

'I can't get out! -- I lost the owner's manual!'

"In response to your request for better communications, I'm going to increase my lengthy explanation by 50%."

National Coffee Day

Big boys' toys-r-us

George is pleased with himself. He replaced the toilet seat without calling a plumber.

'I've never seen anyone lip-sync a speech before.'

"I''' have the misspelled 'Ceasar' salad and the improperly hyphenated veal osso-buco."

'Before we start, would everyone please put your cell phone in the middle of the table?'

"Just look what we can accomplish when we work towards a common goal...LUNCH!"

"I excel at appearing awake in meetings."

"Agenda item 14 C, does anyone have any idea what happened in Game of Thrones?"

"The result of our last meeting are impressive: 3 completely solved crossword puzzles, 7 battleship matches, 5 shopping lists, and 26 really funny doodles."

'And this is where we all suddenly started getting bad vibes.'

'If we are to reorientate our forward facing rhetorical platform we must rephrase our message to cross fertilise the core message..holistically!'

"How 'local' is the fish?"

'Would you like that organic, locally grown, carbon neutral, fair trade, trans fat-free, sugar-free, gluten-free and peanut-free?'

Attendees Anonymous

'And before we start, Higgins, I'd like to remind you that this is not a laughing matter.'