Modernity Mocker Pillows

Freak Show

The Nihilist Deli.

'I'm an extremely general practitioner.'

"The beatings will continue until the morale improves!"

'Please excuse my nurse -- this is her first day on the job.'

"Well, I guess that old saying really is true: the squeaky wheel gets the grease!"

"I like your paperweight, Watkins..."

Earplugs £2 a Pair

Running in please pass

'How much is that yuppy in the window?'

Arrogant OAP.

'For better or worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, until you wish you were dead?'

"I wouldn't usually say, 'she's always copying me' is grounds for divorce."

"If marriage is so great how come you never hear about simulated marriage?"

'The cross doesn't affect him. Let's try with a Star of David.'

"So help me, Henderson, if you sing 'Row Row Row Your Boat' one more time..."

Of all the days to sleep in!

Severe Food Criticism.

'The reality is, if you should go on one of those shows, I doubt that TV viewers would accept you any better than I do!'

"My Mother was right. She told me when I was eighteen, that if I married him it wouldnt last!"

'Hmm...needs refining.'

'Hello, Mr Busino. I understand you're suffering from some drug side effects.'

Yoga Trash Talk

'You can't fire me. I fired you.'

Zoo keeper throwing food to himself.

Jesus' bones.

Northerners see a fashionable stranger and suggest throwing a brick at him

Hague Convention Defied! Repelling an Assault of Flu Germs

"Down here every day is Monday."

"He's a model husband...but not a working model."

"You're lonely and rich and I'm friendly and poor. We're a perfect match, I reckon."

Gala Benefit

Cows chasing bagpipes player.

All Nude Dogs.