
"C’mon, Sara. Like you wouldn’t consider – even for a second – accepting an iPhone from the devil."
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"C’mon, Sara. Like you wouldn’t consider – even for a second – accepting an iPhone from the devil."
"Perhaps in my next life I'll be a jpeg."
"Agreed. They were undoubtedly sack religious."
"This'll show the Theology Department."
''The Thinker' is an outdated concept.'
95 Theses That Will Blow Your Mind!
A Family Out For A Walk In The Country.
"Can atheists refuse to participate?"
'LOL!'
Digital or analog elevators.
'Please... take... a... moment... to... complete... our... brief... survey... to... help... improve... customer... satisfaction... '
Something without the sexual connotation, please.
Corporate Running of the 'Bull'.
'What proof do we have there is a DOG?'
"They're offering special premiums if we use their service."
Speed Dating/Speed Dumping
"I want to believe in Santa Claus, but it's tough in this post-fact, fake news era."
Enough with the e-readers. Blasphemer! Ooh, I can carry 1,000 books at one time. Ooh, I can download books in an instant. Ohh, I can check out the first chapter without buying. But … But you can't see the cover of the book. There is no cover. So? How can I judge a book reader without seeing their cover?! Fair. Disturbing. But fair.
It's so quaint that you're reading a book. Stuff it. You really should get a e-reader. They're hip, great-looking. The future. And apparently you can get really good books on them. Apparently? Owning it is the main thing. Reading is for book people. I fear truth in this.
I hear you're an atheist now. It's the thing to be. What about me? What about you? I have the power to destroy you. So. I am your god! Rethinking position.
"Santa Claus is no longer part of my belief system."
"Eddie, the 'old economy' is making a comeback..."
Progress.
I have an awful headache. Do you have an aspirin? Not so fast, little buddy. A real man doesn't mask his symptoms with pharmaceuticals. Even if it feels like a jackhammer on his forehead, a real man grits his teeth and bears it. A real man rides it out the way he'd ride out a bucking bronco. Not everything in life is a test of my manhood. A real man would beg to differ.
'Have you ever thought of having yourself digitally restored?'
Facebook Grave
"There ain't enough room in this season for the both of us."
Transformed in a Business Woman
"It's hardly my fault if I don't conform to your socially outmoded construct of what attributes constitute the definition of 'well behaved'!"
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