Modern Love Warriors T-Shirts

"I sent a long, passionate, romantic text to my girlfriend, and all she replied was, 'K'. I guess I was expecting a better response."

"...And do you promise if you ever should divorce that you'll remain friends?"

Competitiveness in Ancient Times

"When I first met him, he was my knight in shining armour. But, he hasn't been near the metal polish in years!"

"Of course I love you, I'm just busy with other men."

Generation Ex.

'Do you Margaret take Charles to be your etc, etc, etc...just hit the 'I agree' button.'

'Let's face it...We have irreconcilable differences!'

'I envisioned something more robust'

"By the time we can marry in all fifty states, we'll probably be divorced."

"Zoom says we have connectivity issues..."

"To be honest I'd rather make love not war, but my chat-up lines are terrible."

Modern Charm

'I have rather a full schedule today. Could you summarize your grievances of the past 48 years?'

'Every weekend he's off hunting with his buddies! I never see him!!!'

"We even tried cyber sex, but the line was always busy."

"Not on my watch..."

'Progress. Your prenup process is down to two boxes of tissue a day.'

'Everytime I kiss him he says he can't breathe.'

'I've been married to your sister for 9 years, so why should I be scared of you?'

'I usually don't do online dating.'

"Is there room for me?"

"Don't you dare apologize to me!"

"The only thing we seem to agree on lately is that we always disagree."

"Get me this! Get me that! Get me..."

Dorothy and the singles bar

"I now declare a thumb war."

Facing Covid with love

Two hearts arguing.

"Even after all these years, you can still make me laughso hard I pee my pants...of course, I dod that when I sneeze, too!"

"I'm gay! I'm gay!"

"I remember when these two matched on Hinge, casually retweeted quips on Tweitter, lost each other for a bit, slid into Instagram DMs...and here we are at regular texting and marriage."

"My husband's ill, so I'm standing in for him."

"Do you take this person for better or worse, rich or poor, in sickness even with a high co-pay?"

"He must be really serious to send you something a permanent as an email."