Modern Evidence Collector T-Shirts

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

Jazz is Invented

Gramophone dreams of mp3 player.

Photos of Queen Elizabeth II

'Heirloom Tiffany Lamp Delivery. I Brake for Everything.'

"You're either lying or not telling the truth."

Six jazz instruments.

Large print rock'n'roll section

"Check out this new store."

His cubicle had come to be known as 'Teddy Bear Heaven'.

"Gimme a 'D'! Gimme an 'N'! Gimme an 'A'!"

Useless information desk at trivia buff convention

'Your drug test came back positive. Welcome aboard.'

'...So you claim this is genuine Rembrandt?'

'... Going once...going twice...aaaand--sold! To the gentleman in the front row for a thousand words.'

Groovy Baby

Lady Justice wears a blindfold, but listens through headphones to a tape recorder on one of her scales.

'I don't believe it - if this evidence is correct it'll rock the very foundations of our research grant application.'

Tiny jazz musicians play large drum and bass.

Viola, cello, 1st violin and 2nd violin vending machine.

"Queen begins with Q, it should be precisely here."

"My next witness is his Google Assistant."

'Music & Gym'

"Do you have anything by The Damned."

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."

"And for my next trick, an evidence-based strategy!"

News of the Day - Savings Bank.

Gramaphone Man.

"Fetch, Ernie, fetch!"

"I wonder what this was for."

Even cowgirls get the blues. 'Well, howdy! I've been lookin' for this here B.B. King album forever!'