Modern Disciple T-Shirts

"Lord, if my prayers are pleasing to Thee, please confirm by fax."

Moses on the web

"Trust me Jesus, if you want to make a bigger impact work on being seeker friendly."

'Just ask yourself -- Are you better off now than you were two thousand years ago?'

'The World will speak hip-hop tomorrow.'

"In the same of the phone, the tablet, and the desktop computer."

God's Phone

Jesus is Scourged (The Holy Bible).

"I'm asking you to write your name on the board. Surely you don't need your smart phone to help you spell your name!"

The ten ammendments

"And always remember...If you're going to be sick, always do it on the carpet. It's more absorbent."

"I have an app for that."

"If we could all turn to page 387, turn off your iPods and repeat after me?"

"Only three hundred and sixty-seven followers? Maria's not an asset to the abbey."

I'm doing my essay on John Milton's "Paradise Lost"...the video game.

"Amen. Thanks everyone, oh and don't forget to subscribe!"

'No, Father, they're not praying. They're texting.'

Follow God On Twitter

Spiritual Lives Matter

'It's Sundays like this that I regret our church website is so popular.'

'For your penance, download five 'Hail marys' and ten 'Our fathers'.'

'Does it come on Disc?'

"No matter the weather or what's on my plate, I'm here at five. That's discipline."

"We're testing a new virtual reality praise & worship system for the satellite campus."

"At least we've got a nice day for it..!"

Way too much anthropomorphising

"Our father who art at www.heaven.com..."

'...and we used to grumble about not understanding archaic church language!'

"Can we wait a few seconds? I'm downloading the Excuse App."

'We beseech thee oh Lord, tweet us they word.'

'I invited God to be one of my friends on Facebook and he's turned me down!'

"The time has come to reflect and ask ourselves... 'what would Jesus tweet?'"

'Our church funds seem to be in the computer cloud of unknowing.'

You Have 1 New Messages

'To everything there is a season; a time to cut, and a time to paste...'